Dishonest Customers

by Lisa
(France)

Flying Lady Necklace

Flamenco Earrings

Silver and Hematite Statement Necklace

Glass Japanese Chiyogami Clip-on Earrings

I have seen a couple replies to another post about keeping the customer sweet and always swallowing your pride even when not in the wrong.

The only problem I have with this is what if the customer is truly dishonest and just bad mouths, because this is the only way they know to make themselves feel better about being dishonest?

I am sure we have all met someone like this in life, but how do you deal with it in your jewellery business?

The history of this one customer:

My shipping information states that I send to the buyer's Etsy address even if different than Paypal.

When the purchase was made there was no special instruction or message from the buyer on the checkout. So I sent the earrings the next day to the Etsy address.

I checked up 2 weeks later (as I always do with my international customers) to see if she'd received her earrings.

She proceeded to ask me if I sent them to X address. To which I replied, that "this address does not appear on her Etsy account".

She then asked if I sent them to Y address. To which I replied, "this is not your Etsy or Paypal address".

She then replied that I had deleted a convo her and I had about a different address. I asked her to forward me that convo since I had zero convos from this buyer (I never delete my convos until the user receives their item).

Instead of replying and sending the convo(s), she just left negative feedback. I obviously was not too happy about this and replied in kind.

I feel bad about the unprofessional email, but my final impression of this person was that they were out to cause trouble.

I refuse to "kiss and make up" due to the manner in which they ultimately blamed me for their error through negative feedback.

I would have gladly sent another pair of earrings to the good address had she continued the discussion and not jumped to negative feedback.

How does one handle dishonest customers? I'm at a loss.

Thanks for your thoughts,

Lisa
WildGift Designs

Comments for
Dishonest Customers

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Dealing with difficult, unfair customers
by: Rena

Lisa,

I will never understand folks like this customer, who focus a lot of effort and intention into being difficult and unreasonable. I'm sorry you had to go through that trouble with this one.

On the few occasions when I've had a difficult or unfair customer, I do what I can to resolve the transaction quickly and politely (even if it winds up at a loss for me and unfairly in the bad customer's favor) - and then I "fire" them as a customer.

I simply refuse to ever do business with them again.

Then I put the whole event behind me and focus on the many, many jewelry customers who are so kind and lovely to work with.

My perspective is that life is too short to waste any of it dealing with troublemakers. And people like that tend to be "energy vampires" who thrive on sucking as much time, attention, and happiness out of you as they can.

So I resolve the situation as quickly and politely as possible, depriving them of the opportunity to drag the event out into extended upsetting discussions or repeated emails - which is what many of those people really want.

It's almost impossible to "win" a dispute with a customer like this. They are determined to be unreasonable and to upset you, and are likely to leave negative feedback (as your bad customer did) regardless of what you do.

I think you did the right thing by responding with negative feedback for her, explaining your side of what happened. The rest of your 100% positive feedback record clearly shows your professionalism and solid track record of very happy customers.

Even though folks like this are clearly wrong, I think it's best to get rid of them as quickly as possible - even if you wind up taking a loss on it - since there's no way to win. And don't let them suck any time, energy, or happiness out of you.

Then fire them with satisfaction and move on to your really great jewelry customers.

This newsletter article I wrote a while back has some strategies for dealing with and avoiding unfair customers:

How to Handle Difficult Jewelry Customers.

By the way, Lisa, I positively drooled over everything in your Etsy shop - particularly the Flying Lady Necklace above! Love your stuff.

Great Advice Rena!
by: Lisa

It is often difficult for me to not take things so personally and after so much time it still bugs me how I acted. I always think I could've handled it better. This experience has made me very wary and careful. I will have a look at your article and thank you again so much for your reply. It is very insightful. Best, Lisa

Sorry
by: d'Olivia

Isn't there also a danger that, if you send it to an address that is not the Etsy address (or PayPal address) that the person may have hacked into the Etsy account falsely? I haven't had that happen to me yet, but just wondering. Also, is there a way to block a person from purchasing from your shop again? I know you can block certain buyers on Ebay. Your buyer sounds like she either just wanted to make trouble, or perhaps even wanted to buy something fraudulently.

she'll rot in hell
by: pat barden

dont even bother--why beg a jerk. you cannot argue witha liar--anyone with half a brain will see that neg feedback--and think--two sides to every story--and chances are--she got the order--no one pays for something, doesnt get it, and just leaves neg feedback. certainly the address you sent it to--had a forward on it athe post office--she got her order.
let her think shes made a difference withe one neg fback--she hasnt.
and for all that--she can have a blast nexto the furnace someday

Handling Bad Situations with Grace
by: Anonymous

I've had a similar situation happen w/an Etsy buyer as well. Thankfully, she cancelled her order before she paid and so was not able to leave negative feedback on that item and her other feedback comments to me were all perfect!

However, she had ordered from me before and she was still using some of my jewelry components/findings to create some of her designs,...only now, after our little 'incident' (I used her first name only on a reserved listing like I had the first time she purchased a special order from me and she came unglued, and turned me into Etsy for privacy violation and cancelled her very large order) she started actually saying in the details section of her product information that those specific components were handmade by her and she actually had the nerve to cut/paste my word-for-word description of how I hand forged, formed, tumbled, polished, etc. them!

I have absolutely no recourse that I can take w/this person (she could have just copied my designs and made it herself I guess,....but it's sooo exactly like mine that I double it) and I now ask people when I do a reserved listings for them, unless they are regular customers, how they want their reserved listings set up (I had someone accidentally purchase something that wasn't theirs because it just said "reserved" and I have other customers who prefer that I don't use their shop names because they don't want their competition to know where they get their supplies) so as to never upset anyone again.

I learned exactly what Rena said above,...just take the high road, be as nice and professional as you possibly can and move forward, looking to all the fabulous customers/clients you have out there and all the positive things that are yet to come.

Oddly enough though, I'm rather happy knowing this will all come back to bite her in her booty one day,....it alwasy does in the end when you're rotten to the core! So, rest assured, you person will have someone who acts towards her just the way she did towards you,...and hopefully she will understand and learn and become a better person after that happens!

Unable to click on her link
by: Anonymous

I am unable to click on the link for your jewerly (it says "oops" no link found when I click on it) and I want to see it as the pics you have here are really fantastic!!

And, don't worry about the negative folks,....there's always a few of them out there!

Don't Be So Hard on Yourself
by: Diane - Earth & Sky Studio

Lisa -

I'm so sorry you've gone through this situation. I can tell that you are a very conscientious person b/c you are being hard on yourself and replaying it over and over in your mind. I hope you will let it go b/c there was nothing you could do with that person that would've made her a happy customer. She was hell-bent on being negative.

One negative feedback among all the other great feedback will only show people that the buyer has a personal problem - and it is her attitude. cause. You just happened to be in her target range that day.

You were being a good business woman to stand firm in your response to her negative feedback. Good for you! Continue putting out quality and let this customer fly out of your mind once and for all. Good luck to you!

I've fixed Lisa's WildGift link
by: Rena

So sorry - I don't know how I messed up Lisa's link above - but I've fixed it now!

Thanks so much for letting me know.

Here is the correct link again:
WildGift Designs.

Your comments are so helpful
by: Lisa

Hi all, thank you for all your words. This outlet on Rena's site has helped tremendously. At least I know I am not the only one and now know how to manage in the future (fingers crossed) if it happens again.

For the link, I didn't heed Rena's rules and added HTTP:// to the front of my link and so did she when she posted it. The link you can copy and paste to see my page is www.wildgiftdesigns.com.

Thanks again all for your positive and supportive comments.

Kind regards, Lisa

Policies are helpful
by: french Elegant Jewelry

I think it helps to have your policies written out in your description or on your site. Such as no returns after 30 days. Not responsible for breakage of jewelry from rough handling, wear in water and etc. That way you are covered I also include that I am not responsible for loss or damage in the mail. I always used delivery confirmation which is good for both sides in knowing if jewelry was received or not. I had one lady who's rings disappeared with her mail carrier and were never delivered. I gave her a discount to my shop so she bought a bunch of stuff and I made her another of the ring that never arrived. It was a $5 expense so it was worth it. $100 necklaces are a different story. Definitely after 15 months of wear I would remake it at a price. If she had bought it at the store they wouldn't have taken it as a return.

You sometimes have to stand your ground
by: Anonymous

Unfortunately, some people are out to take advantage. I have always replaced anything lost in transit before I started sending it by sign-only mail. I fix anything broken, even if it has been mistreated. But a recent occurance shocked me and I realised that sometimes you have to stand your ground.

A new neighbour asked me if I could make her a necklace - she gave me a description of what she wanted in vague, faux-art terms. I procured some stones, and laid it out for her, suggesting that she would need something else added for it to sit right. No, she wanted it the way she imagined it. Seeing she wouldn't be swayed I made and delivered it shortly after. She loved it, paid for it and wore it to a wedding the following weekend.

A few weeks later she said the necklace wasn't sitting completely right so could I add something to it and replace the clasp (sterling silver) with a larger version. I offered her a few choices of the additional stones which she selected and I remade it, with the additions and the larger clasp at no additional charge.

A mutual friend then told me a couple of weeks later that my neighbour still wasn't happy with the necklace and wanted to return it for a refund! (My policies state I will take items back for a full refund if they are returned within the time limit stated and they are unworn). I was so shocked that I told this friend that I wouldn't accept it as a return as the woman had worn it, her young children had probably chewed and at least slobbered all over it and I had already changed it once to her specifications. I then went on to say I would remodel it again if she asked and this time would insist she sat down with me and made sure she was happy with it.

In hindsight, I should have just said 'get her to call me'. But the message obviously got passed on and I haven't heard from the neighbour since - although I have heard her complain to the mutual friend about the 'debacle with the necklace'!

I have since heard of her taking advantage of other people in the district and trying to get her friends to do her asking, borrowing and favours.

It's all very well to turn the other cheek, or do what the customer asks and I have no hesitation in doing so most of the time, but some people have to realise that they can't take advantage of other people, otherwise they will continue to do so. Someone has to take the fall out so that everyone else will benefit in the longer term.

So, her snide comments may damage my reputation slightly, but hopefully my reputation for excellence will outlast it and people will come to see this woman for what she is, and she will have learned she can't make unreasonable demands!

I hear you
by: bead lover

I had two incidents - not exactly dishonesty but reasons to fire a customer (which I did in the one case).

I had one woman who would routinely buy a lot of jewelry and then a few months later return some of it for one reason or another. I actually don't think she wore it but it irked me when items were returned out of season. I elimnated this problem by taking her off my show distribution list.

I used to do adjustments on my items until I had one incident that pushed me over the edge. I never liked doing adjustments anyway as i felt once I was done with a piece I was done with it and felt complete, and going back to change it was rework. Anyway, I was still agreeing to shorten items upon request for free. So, this one customer, after I handed her the shortened version, which required me to restring and replace crimps asks me for the extra beads I removed (which I think were two). I was astonished. The item had been marked down half price and I provided her a service for free. After that I had a policy of no adjustments, which has worked beautifully for the most part.

Dishonest Customers
by: Anonymous

In the 9 years I've been in business I've only had 2 exceptionally rude, dishonest customers.

The first one was back in 2005 when she purchased 6 necklaces from a craft mall site that paid the vendors after the work was sent out to the customer. She complained to the site management that the necklaces were broken and she wanted a refund. She was very angry that I wouldn't refund her money without getting the broken items back. The site manager had told me that this lady was doing this to several vendors, and most of them let her keep the hand crafted items.

She finally sent the necklaces back, and they all looked deliberately destroyed. A kind of "I'll show her" type of thing. I did refund her money, as I received the damaged jewelry back.

I was really glad I stood my ground. Her negative comments were removed from the entire site as she left only negative ones for the 25 vendors she scammed.

Some people can be awful
by: Lisa W.

Some people can be just awful to work with, and as some here have said, they seem to get off on playing games. The only way I know to deal with people like this is not to deal with them, if at all possible. I have been lucky, although I have have had a few negative experiences, I haven't had one of these on Etsy.

It's hard to remove your emotions from the situation, but I think you did a good job. In general, I always find that being as kind and polite as possible while still remaining professional can go a long way to ease situations. A customer can't "fight" with you if you aren't fighting back. I don't know if Etsy has any kind of conflict resolution center, but it would be worth reporting her name if they do. Since you can also leave feedback on your customers site, I would suggest you do that. I would try to remain professional and businesslike, maybe something like "Please be specific in the future about your shipping address. Sellers, please be aware that there are shipping issues involving this customer." This can help you to remain professional, gives other sellers a warning, and may give this customer a reason to be more reasonable.

Finally, reading some of the issues others have experienced makes me wonder if it might be worthwhile to list a rather stringent set of policies (No adjustments, no returns after XX days, ...etc) and then go the extra mile when we want to (excellent customer service), but at our discretion. This way, we can back up a refusal to let someone take advantage of us, but we can offer to "be nice" if we choose. I'm not sure, but it's something to think about.

Scammers indeed
by: eyekandiicosmetics

I have been selling on etssy for a few years now, and get "bloggers" all the time asking for free stuff. and what they do is "check out" with items using the other payment method so they dont pay for it.
well i had one girl do this and never paid, i sent her tiems TWICE... even though she never paid.

she has left me negitige feedback each time even though she hasnt even paid for the items.

i had to get a court order to get the feedback remvoed, she has done this to me on numeous accoutns on both etsy and ebay!

BEWARE OF USERNAME ASHLEY206!!! SHE is a huge scam artist and will only leave negitive feedback and get free junk!!!

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